I’ll Let The Stories Tell You: Parçigal’s rant

i/i

Sweet man, they have been telling our story all along. I’ll tell it to you as I heard it so just sit down and:

“Hear the sad rhyme of how love turned to lust, and lust invigorated love, and love shone brighter for the stain it rose above.” 21

Sugrbeat, it is day one and already are you floating in your peaceful, wet c/sea with “all foolish loves of men” and suddenly you said, “Thither I Fled.”

While later you said “Come hither” to me. And, hither I came.

You later told me, “I followed like a dog…tied by some soft bond of twinning.”

I saw your eye sparkle while you spoke it. I hear you in those moments of desire unexpressed, dear. It made me think the “perfect sage could make the perfect lover.” Singular purposed in their craft as I try to be for mine.

( “Fool! Later on. Not to tell her. Triple fool to fly away.” )

We met because “she read-and saw him but a beardless boy…quite powerless to destroy her life’s long peace; the ten year-walled city,

And then I said, “I think the poem is pretty.”

Howl we endeared “under the dim glory in the shrine of Artemis.” She is ally to me as Aura was to my sister. Do you remember that night we stayed over in a b&b? I told you a filthy version just to try to get rise from your denim, button fly.

“The heart’s pulse quickning; the fear; the increasing ecstasy of this. The foolishness of love”. And, yet, we “give love one chance before its wave retire,” and “Maytime shone in us; with words of art.”

“Unless my Alice be the sea,” you kept repeating.

“As you yield you

To love that is stronger than shame, no music but kisses, that pealed you their paean, proclaim: the sound of the sea is made still

The climax shall come unupbraided, obedient alone to our will.”


” it was impossible that she should come,” you said,

“Over the summer-coloured sea, alone, with love and laughter and tears for me.”

Therefore, not fearing anything, I came; lit my love’s candle at my body’s flame and fought with the fevers now that swell.

From Alice: An Adultery

Means and Ends: The Way of CHUANG TZU

As is a practice, I flipped through a book snapped from the shelf at random.

There was a metro ticket from a trip taken.

It fell before the start of this reading.

It fell at the end of the other reading included.

As an investigator of method, Tao, mysticism, I found it of interest. Surprise, right? Giggle.

A couple of extra quotes from different readings included below.

MEANS AND ENDS

The gate keeper in the capital city of Sung became such an expert mourner after his father’s death, and so emaciated himself with fasts and austerities, that he was promoted to high rank in order that he might serve as a model of ritual observance.

As a result of this, his imitators so deprived themselves that half of them died. The others were not promoted.

The purpose of a fish trap is to catch fish, and when the fish are caught, the trap is forgotten.

The purpose of the rabbit snare is to catch rabbits. When the rabbits are caught, the snare is forgotten.

The purpose of words is to convey ideas. When the ideas are grasped, the words are forgotten.

Where can I find a man who forgotten words? He is the one I would like to talk to.

[xxvi. 11.]


THE USELESS

Hui Tzu said to Chuang Tzu:

“All your teaching is centered on what has no use.”

Chuang replied:

“If you have no appreciation for what has no use

You cannot begin to talk about what can be used.

The earth, for example, is broad and vast

But of all this expanse a man uses only a few inches

Upon which he happens to be standing.

Now suppose you suddenly take away

All that he is not actually using

So that, all around his feet a gulf

Yawns, and he stands in the Void,

With nowhere solid except right under

each foot:

How long will be he able to use what he is using?”

Hui Tzu said:

“It would cease to serve any purpose.”

Chuang Tzu concluded:

“This shows

The absolute necessity

Of what has ‘no use.'”

[xxvi. 7.]


Keng’s Disciple

The disciple got some supplies,

Traveled seven days and seven nights

Alone,

And came to Lao Tzu.

Lao asked: “Do you come from Keng?”

“Yes,” replied the student.

“Who are all those people you have

brought with you?”

The disciple whirled around to look.

Nobody there. Panic!

Lao said: “Don’t you understand?”

The disciple hung his head. Confusion!

Then a sigh. “Alas, I have forgotten my

answer.”

(More confusion!) “I have also forgotten

my question.”

Lao said: “What are you trying to say?”

The disciple: “When I don’t know,

people treat me like a fool.

When I do know, the knowledge gets me in trouble.

When I fail to do good, I hurt others.

When I do good, I hurt myself.

If I avoid my duty, I am remise,

But if I do it, I am ruined.

How can I get out of these contradictions?

That is what I came to ask you.”

Lao Tzu said: You are trying to sound

The middle of the ocean

With a six foot pole…

You have got lost, and are trying

To find your way back

To your own true self.

You find nothing

But illegible signposts

Pointing in all directions…

If your obstructions

Are on the outside,

Do not attempt

To grasp them one by one

And thrust them away.

Impossible! Learn

To ignore them.

If they are within yourself,

You cannot destroy them piecemeal,

But you can refuse

To let them take effect.

If they are both inside and outside,

Do not try

To hold on to Tao–

Just hope that Tao

Will keep hold of you.”

The disciple asked:

“Is this perfection?”

Lao replied: “Not at all. If you persist in trying

To attain what is never attained

(It is Tao’s gift!)

If you persist in reasonsing

About what cannot be understood,

You will be destroyed

By the very thing you seek.

To know when to stop

To know when you can get no further

By your own action,

this is the right beginning!”

[xxiii. 3-7]

Merton, Thomas. The Way of Chuang Tzu. Shambhala Publications, Inc. Boston & London. 1992.

Copyright 1965 by the Abbey of Gethsemani

Imagine a Pendulum

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When a pendulum is displaced sideways from its resting equilibrium position, it is subject to a restoring force due to gravity, that will accelerate it back towards the equilibrium position. When released, the restoring force acting on the pendulum’s mass then causes it to oscillate  about the equilibrium position, swinging back and forth.

The time for one complete cycle, a left swing and a right swing, is called a period. The period depends on the length of the pendulum’s swing.


In the same vein, “when we hold our breath at the end of inhaling and before exhaling, we experience a state in which the process of becoming seems to be suspended…It gives the impression of a break from the past, quantum leap. For Sufi’s, time is ever recurrent rather than linear.”

P.58 The Ecsatsy Beyond Knowing. Pir Vilayt Inayat Khan.

“What seems to be coming and going is really the result of becoming and manifestation. ”

P.58 The Ecsatsy Beyond Knowing. Abu’l-Hasan al -Hujwiri.

“When the owner of waqt (the instant of time) comes into possession of hal (that is: it becomes a permanent state) he is no more subject to change, and is made steadfast in his state.”

P59 The Ecsatsy Beyond Knowing. Abu’l-Hasan al -Hujwiri.

“Witnessing only takes place when two lights come together.”

Muhyiad-Din Ibn ‘Arabi. quoted from The Sufi Path of Knowledge 


I call out for you to breath back and forth against my lips. The light upon light of eyes into eyes.

Quicken the periodicity.

VVöderland Notes from Parçigal

Underground currents,

conducted by Mæstrœs, at

certain key-stone sites where

lode-stones are ritualistic-ally, mystic-ally, and magick-ally

fawned over; and then,

pressed close-ally and

firmly into the lay-line

which will magnetize

the electric charge of

both Keystones & Lodestones,

(grail, cisterns, resevoir, from Latin ‘cista’ chest, arches, Ark, Lantern)

allowing the earth’s current to

be conducted to

those natural lay-lines sites that

just occur;

but, with an

increase in energetic out-put on

the scale of 150x.

Energy is pulled to the key/lode -stones; and,

held or redistributed by:

Maestrœs; Music Masters; Mæcens

using minnesingers; idiotēs; meisters; Mægens.

Magisters. fellows.

Hærlœts; a Lady; Maidens; handmaids; handmaidens

Milkmaids.


Hand

Made.

like a
A lice ntious ladder.


Maven; mavin; matron; knights; diabolūs, sons of Socrates, the ‘diatribe’


(“a private ind’l”)


Hermit. Hermetic. hermeneutics. Vermillion.

roses, swans, graal, gradalis, gra(d)al

scribes that transcribe

rishis, sannyasins, dervishes

Infants,

Mavericks,

Arhats.

Simoon

The vortex belongs to a dust devil

Driving itself across scorched earth.

A man’s head covered in a vermillion tar-bush

Foot-pressed to its state by a wo/man in love with him.

This is the kind of love that enabled

The second exodus.

Washing and care instructions:

Love materials before wearing.

Exceptional Notebook Nonsense: Install One.

ALL RULES HAVE EXCEPTIONS.

ALL RULES ARE EXCEPTIONAL.

ALL EXCEPTIONS MAKE THE RULE.

THE RULE WITHOUT EXCEPTION IS EXCEPTIONABLE.

[it is an exception to the starting rule

that all rules have exceptions]


You die a voodoo death because everyone else expects it of you.

The uncommon tragedy of the commons is that there is nothing anyone cares to do.

Contagions of group expectations afflict your field of view.

A cursed question put on you–

Would you die if no one

thought you would?

  Or, could.

Authority instructs you to confront mortality.

You are part of the totality,

but individually, you are

also, a triviality

What I may be is the value of a binary threshold function.


Insert the prefix ‘looking-‘

to ‘-glass house’.

Suddenly, and without warning (giggle-howl) a hypocrite becomes a stranger in a strange-land.

Have you ever tried this?

Write something.

Wait.

Then,

read it and weep.

Giggle with me?


The forcefield is too big. ‘Cause, it used to have to be, possibly.

Not anyone’s fault.

We can always blame

No-One.

Or bang (bang).

During our REM dream states.

Not in the same environment ampersand; now, the forcefield is energetically askew and effing with the universal grid?

How ostensibly ego-centric to think so, no?  Yeah?

What?

Compassion for self.

Self-hatred was that wall that enabled self-preservation.


  1. i hated myself for hurting/you hate yourself for hurting;

i do not hate what hurt me/you do not hate what hurt you.

What hurt me (you) did/does not hate me

(you).


It is that silly and dumb to hear aloud from this fool.

How to answer the question: Can you truly say ‘no’?

Giggle.

Try to say what you mean when you answer that one.

 

Howl I

(can)

howl.

This is not deliberate confusion.

But, sure seems confusingly deliberate.

Rejoinder?


Indulgence relative. Just do not hurt people.


Three reasons I love a timely, kind laugh.

Apparently.

  1. see 1. above
  2. Authenticity under austerity becomes through sincerity                                           ?
  3. It is not that you pay for what you get; it is that you get what you pay* for.

 

 

*we ain’t just talking currency/wages, folks.

 


 

It is okay to admit you are enraged at a potentially outrageous situation.

Enrage is your ego yelling.

Outrage is your heart yelling.

Your heart only yells when others suffer too.

Being enraged and being outraged is possible.

Being enraged and ego-maniacal is possible.

What a drag….

….that i cannot get over myself until I admit that I cannot get over myself.

This is silent howling.

This is giggling.

This is authentic, at the least (

Right

exactly  now

). Are you over yourself already?

 

What are these sighs that I imagine?

Whose low end groan comes down the cans?

 

Speculation: A song that can end itself and not just fade out.

Humm.

You Seeking That?

I cannot


me


I want to



Music hooks my attention. If ‘decent,’ it moves through my spine like currents.

Time changes.

Threaded to be unwound

Like a record’s groove.

Linear thread to unwind in the minotaur’s maze.

Did you bring your own thread this time?


Trying to attune to the ephemeral and corporeal energetic grid.

Doing in contribution, perhaps sight unseen.

Tao.

Tao of the mystic

Doubt everything and everyone

while

simultaneously

trusting people and things to be who and what they ‘are.’

Method of attempted peace and openness.

Silence. Again.

Why had she said so much?

Why did she not listen?

Again? Selfish?

She knew it kinda hurt.

So, she wo/andered as she wa/ondered.

Could 24 hours of her silence help her hear?

Speak, please.

If you wilt.

She is patient.

‘Parzifal’ notes

P. thought “only by passive love will he prevail.” Is verse from book VII only made in response to the A.’s first request of the seer: “make herself perfectly passive” in order he might communicate freely.”?


Hummm. Still working on wtf we have here in terms of meaning.

WTF is a German Lodge Book?

Is it just the alchemical appartus comprising a story? An alchemical apparatus used to drive the plot, scaffold the structure, and act as a skeleton key to unlock meaning?

Such an apparatus drives the substance of letters and words towards catharsis. Our story-tech equipment enables a bunch of words to be read by an audience. The collection of words becomes greater than the sum of its parts. This is a non-linear phenomenon, akin to complexity theory.

Confluence. Convergence.

This is how the array of letters constituting the matrix of each page transmutates scrawlings into Art.

The reader undergoes the cathartic process like catalytic enzymes provoking biological reactions.

Defiant Hirsutism

 

“The arrows of song through Hell cease to hurtle.

Away to the passionate gardens of Greece,

Where the thrush is awake, and the voice of the turtle

Is soft in the amorous places of peace.”

 

Oh, sweet ephebe. Are you cold? Are your toes warm?

I walk upright citizen but in my dreams, I run on all fours, swift and steadily clumsy.  Stacked buxom and epicurean in ample bosom.

Slight shelf formed in the concave curve of lower spine conjuncting with the lift of rounded, stood and lit cheeks.

Callipygian ass. Firm round mammæ. Slight ripple of a stubborn tummy covering my unused womb where I metaphysically minister to the devotees calling themselves Moira’s Nudes.

Rosebud. Ease into the garden.


Come and let us attend the Chymical Wedding of Christian Rosenkreutz.

I tried to read the instructive booklet, fuzzy beast, but it was a bit confusing.

Something about the feminine and masculine now unified sharing a new womb, the regenerative apparatus giving both the capacity for pregnancy, both allegorically and through magical realism.


The poet didn’t eff his lady.

the lady tried to give him her body. Her Desire. you laughed. and prioritized your spiritual needs.

Her Love craves to be obtainable, tactile, nourishing, fun, wild and feral yet warm and protective.

Her love exceeds her desire/s.

Her love sacrifices her desires to enkindle the flame.

She who was Wittgenstein’s Mistress

read you clear now.

Do you read me: your desire came before your love.

How I howl.

Breathwork and Attunement Practices

The Sufi tradition practices a personalized method of aspiring to study the alchemical arts.  Raised as a member of a Methodist church as a youngster, I became disillusioned with organized religions during my teenage years.  Studying physical/medical anthropological at university, I came to realize that the practice of Academia faculty seemed quite similar to religious institutions.  I grew disillusioned seeing how much more interest professors appeared to put towards their own research. Perhaps, these are burdens imposed on them by the administration. PhD candidates and grad students served as substitute teachers and ghostwriters.

Coming from the Dirty South, the debate between religion and science gets a little extra hairy.  Scientists were speaking with the same pomp and pretense and puffery as those they were accusing of being ignorant.  University professors preoccupied with needing to make tenure. University professors who made tenure and should have retired long ago.  I then investigated the esoteric, hermetic groups and loved their texts and mythos, but I do not like secrets.


Sometimes the appearance of a secret is more alarming than the content of the secret itself.


I came across several wonderful texts by Sufi writers over the last three years.  What resounded most for me was the simplicity of the practices recommended.  There is no dogma to be institutionalized, no one forces their thoughts on others, but neither do they fear engaging in a lively discussion.  These practices are so wildly simple. They made such a substantial difference in my life over the last year that I wanted to share some broad strokes.


BREATHWORK

Four fundamental models of breathing correspond to four fundamental alchemical processes.

Consider each mode of breath as a re-attunement to the world around you.

Perform each mode of breath three to five times before moving to the next breath.

Each mode of breath begins on the exhalation.

The rhythm of breathing must be natural. No retention of breath.

(i) Filtering: exhale through your nose/inhale through your nose. EARTH. Yellow Square. Taurus sigil. North.

(ii) Liquifying: exhale through your mouth/inhale through your nose. WATER. Silver Crescent. Scorpio sigil. West.

(iii) Burnishing: exhale through nose/inhale through your mouth. FIRE. Red Triangle. Leo sigil. South.

(iv) Distilling: exhale through your mouth/inhale through your mouth. AIR. Blue circle. Aquarius sigil. East.

On breathing, think to yourself: I am turning within; withdrawing from any external environment and into myself.  I am drawing the environment into myself to convert and transmute it.

Between inhalations and exhalations, suspend any thoughts other than preparing to resume your breath. Note that there will be a rest, a tacet/tacit pause in between the inhalation and exhalation & again between the exhalation and the inhalation. Feel that slight pause and think only of preparing to change the direction of your breath.

“Sense the emergence in yourself of something new–not the way you ingest the environment–but something that lay in wait within you and that emerges when catalyzed by its counterpart in the environment.  We are recurrently reborn” (p40).

The Ecstasy Beyond Knowing: A Manual of Meditation
Book by Inayat Khan
Try to prolong the exhalation further and further on each breath.
When exhaling, first contract the abdomen, then the chest.
When inhaling, first dilate the abdomen, then the chest.
Imagine that you are nothing but energy/life fields coalescing and cascading. 
(i) static magnetic field
(ii) electromagnetic field that derives from the dynamic nature of of body functions (like mitosis)
(iii) gravitational field you might feel in an elevator in motion
(iv) chi force: experienced when shifting one’s concentration from chakra to chakra.
(v) etheric body that pulses with your breath
               Per, Oxford English Concise (OED), ETHER: DIETHYL ETHER, for example*.
(vi) the aura (bioluminecense)
(vii) celestial body
              Per, the OED: positioned in or relating to sky/outer space.
Consider the arrow of time (horizontal vector) and the transcendental dimension.
Consider the way we extrapolate between two vantage points–confess further dimensionality on our consciousness.
Consider your personal vantage point and the antipodal divine point of view.
Sufi’s endeavor to bring the divine viewpoint to light by Experience rather than Conception.
“Divinity is human perfection and humanity is divine limitation,” Hazrat Inayat Khan
Our breath reflects the ebb and flow of the divine breath.
Sufism validates what is gained in the existential state, the dervishes endeavor to explore the manner in which this timeless state flows into the process of becoming (p57). Note that on page 30, “process of becoming” is used to describe the first of two dimensions we consider in time–the arrow of time and its vectors.
Imagine a Pendulum 
When a pendulum is displaced sideways from its resting, equilibrium position, it is subject to a restoring force due to gravity that will accelerate it back toward the equilibrium position. When released, the restoring force acting on the pendulum’s mass causes it to oscillate about the equilibrium position, swinging back and forth.
The time for one complete cycle, a left swing and a right swing, is called a period. The period depends on the length of the pendulum and also a slight degree on the amplitude, the width of the pendulum’s swing.
“What seems to be coming and going is really the result of becoming and manifesting. When the owner of ‘waqt’ (instant of time) comes into possession of hal (that is: it becomes a permanent state) he is no more subject to change, and is made steadfast in his state.”  p58 Abu’l – Hasan al-Hujwiri

*I was unfamiliar with what ‘ether’ meant, so I figured I’d include it here: 1. a pleasant smelling, volatile, highly flammable liquid used as an anesthetic and as a solvent 2. Chemistry any organic compound with an oxygen atom linking two alkyl groups 3. (also aetherChiefly literary the clear sky; the upper regions of air beyond the clouds. 4. (also aetherPhysics, historical a substance formerly postulated to permeate all space and to transmit light.
ORIGIN ME: from OFr., or via L. from Gk aithêr ‘upper air’, from the base of aithein ‘burn, shine’.
ethereal: 1. extremely delicate and light, in a way that seems not to be of this world 2. chemistry (of a solution) having diethyl ether as a solvent.

Disambiguation…

The line is not: You pay for what you get.


The steganographia is not the encryption is not the transcryption,

Nor is it the ostensible coding.


Encoding=scribing.


The poison is the dose.

The doz>s>e is the poison.

The map is not the region.

“Here I do have a theory: Perhaps we got across because we sailed on the ocean and not on a map.”

THE RA EXPEDITIONS

Thor Heyerdahl

DOUBLEDAY publishing

Page (ostensibly) 341 aka M(42)

Imagine that ( x ) = x in subSCRIPT

Here you find (sub)SCrypçione


The lyric is: you get what you pay for.

Un/Canny

“Eff abstinent. I want you to be obstinate for me,” he said.

“If it cannot be with guns, they will do it with chains/aws/ & stones,” he said.

Rejoinder: “You become a chimp from being a chump, when í substitite an i for a u.” I think Abraham Lincoln said that. Giggle.

Rerejoinder: “We turn o to a and from a crone comes the crane.”

Anyone watched Suspiria yet?

Priapys & Babble-on

Effie here. Hiya. Recovered notes from Parçiful are transcribed below. These are the earliest of journal entries that speak to her metaphysical confusion.

From VVönderland.

(Note: this is transcribed directly as it was found.)


She knew they were disappointed, angry perhaps, that she had not told them what they thought she knew. She was disappointed no one spoke directly to her. She was a strange bird. She shape shifted her appearance, she had odd eyes when lost in thought. She had been so sugary sweet for so long, people had come to expect it of her. Her family viewed it as unhappiness because she used to be so happy. Well, yeah, we all were once many things. She began remembering strange things. She began knowing things that were impossible for her to know. She carried memories of others that they could not remember. She overcame her disdain of silicon only to find the internet stranger than she remembered. But then again, maybe she had never used it.

We live in a pool of energy. Your consciousness is at once in your mind and all minds. Your attention is the key. You can live lives without memory if your consciousness was not there, not attuned.

She could not understand her own opinions on drug use, much less explicate a formal point of view. However, she started rattling off every synonym for sanctuary she could think of when she smoked, for a while. The idea that drug taking was a sacrifice for the sanctuary of others crossed her mind. A little self harm balancing the world of pain and sensation. Maybe that was backwards, maybe drug taking hurt other people.

Her senses might have been too highly attenuated. Too much fight or flight. She felt observed by Socratic circles. She felt like an A&R man who would get fired at any moment. She felt like she had been used again and again. She did not deny she was imperfect. She never claimed to be the perfect partner. She could turn codependent if she was not careful. She could retreat into her mind for weeks and leave her partner floundering alone.

She felt she had a special thing with words. Reading them. Sometimes, as she took notes, what she wrote read like someone else talking to her. But, what a crazy, unspeakable notion, the kind they call women crazy for asserting. She tried to speak of it to her father and sister, but it did not go well. She explained her thoughts on the magicians use of the mystics to N.

The mystics had been played, tooled with, used, and judged. Many people with mystic proclivities seemed unaware and frequently received diagnoses and medication that had little to do with an ailment. The magicians had a questionable stance regarding their right to use others. They knew this though and she had a strange intuition that she was new. Go figure. So, they were trying to level the playing field, but she could tell they were scared of her, of what she might say. Ludicrous. She would not be believed. No one would listen anyway.

She sent a single page email and was told that it was long. Made her right sad to hear. One page? If only she could figure out how to use effing memes to get the point across. What would these idiots do without their wifi?

She was over it. She had been ready to share and speak for ten years. Hopeful she could, in fact. But, now she was tired, alone. She did not care for what the world had become. She felt so old compared to her contemporaries. Their fun just was not hers. Once you read too much, there is no going back.

Notes on Bayadere Ballet (the word/s flow/z below like the lyriç of ballet.

.

Youtube allows us to see tons of art that we may not usually get exposed to.

Like, ballet for me. Alvin Ailey is one among many other state, city, and national ballets that are familiar to most us, in theory. When was the last time you watched a ballet start to finish? Never for me; until, I saw the above performance. Thanks to youtube.

The Balanchine tradition cannot help but be my personal fave.

It reminds me more of yoga poses, the breathwork, physicality and poise are enough to usually bring a tear or two, though it is a very uncynical thing to admit. It is also super brutal looking. The practice and repetition of the same basic movements over time enables this art to enliven through proper breathing to oxidize muscles while balancing precariously.

The European and western ballet companies cannot hold a candle to the art expressed by the Boshoi Ballet. Alchemy in action.

I wrote letters from the words in the opening/closing credits, the subtitlez,and the actual youtube info on my screen. It contained characters in another language.

A meditation for sure.

Cheers.

Sleep Paralysis: The man who photographs his nightmares

The man who photographs his nightmares.

http://flip.it/2h5QOj

Grey scale.

Not one but two.

The Brothers not The Lovers.

Breathe.

Non-Western immortals of Mythos: INDRA (cite Am. Practical F.&W. ’43.)

Indra.

Figures & Illustrations are never un-welcomed–i don’t care who you are.

Like, a phrase like “Get Outta tha Cab!!!”–can be good, nonclean and funny–don’t matter who, ya arse.

Note: with the Diagram to the right of Indra, I wonder, could the tool of induction be used along with the def. of induction coil such that even the most lay-of-laymen could ennoble the manifestation of the thing from the idea. Reach into the ether, pinch finger-to-thumb and make-manifest a machine from the immaterial?

Howl yeah, í reckon.

Words4Free

and

Illustrating Examples

En-courag-IngPen March hairz.